Worship and Evangelization Outreach / Teresa Venatta

The ‘three chairs’ in spiritual direction and a call to personal growth

One universal image often used to describe spiritual direction is three chairs—one for the spiritual director, one for the directee, and one for the presence of the Holy Spirit (the true “director” in this relationship). Together, the director and the directee prayerfully focus attention toward God, through the intercession of the Holy Spirit, in search of a deeper awareness of God’s presence in the life of the directee.

The spiritual director’s loving presence offers a hospitable space for the directee to discern and reflect on where God is moving in their life. Each of the “chairs” has a unique offering in our Catholic/Christian call to personal growth and in building Church community.

In the directee’s chair, there sits a seeker of God. This is a person who desires to deepen their awareness of God’s daily presence through companionship with a compassionate “soul friend” with whom they can freely talk. This seeker is mindful that in order to move forward in living their faith more fully, it might be helpful to have intentional space to reflect out loud their joys and struggles in the light of our loving God.

This seeker may also have a desire to be open and candid with someone who is “detached” from their personal life. This should be a relationship of deep listening and mirroring back without the typical give and take of conversations with family and friends.

The spiritual direction relationship exists solely as a reflective ministry for the directee on their spiritual journey. It is important to remember that the primary responsibility of the spiritual direction experience is always on the directee. The seeker commits to forming spiritual disciplines and practices—to create a sacred space in their life where God can act. There is a willingness to be vulnerable in this companioned quest for God and purpose.

In the spiritual director’s chair, there sits a person who sees God as the source and goal of life. We come from God, and all of life is a spiritual journey back to God. Spiritual directors are deeply aware of God’s merciful presence in their own life and have personally benefited from spiritual direction themselves. They have prayerfully discerned the call to this ministry of listening presence and should have completed certified spiritual direction formation.

Catholic/Christian spiritual directors also commit to being engaged in the sacramental life of the Church, personal prayer and continuing formation. They are not directive in terms of telling a person what to do nor are they advisory (though suggestions may be offered).

Spiritual directors respect the dignity of all persons and maintain confidentiality as sacred trust. Spiritual directors understand that the life of the directee is holy ground and pray that the faithfulness and attentiveness offered to the directee mirrors God’s surpassing care.

Finally, and most importantly, in the Holy Spirit’s chair, there is wisdom present. It is foundational that there is the awareness in both the spiritual director and the directee that the Holy Spirit is the true director. As a result, this relationship must be anchored in prayer. The Church teaches us that the Holy Spirit is the mutual love of God the Father and God the Son. The intentional time and space of spiritual direction can open the door to this flow of love which beacons us forward on our life journey to intimacy with the mystery of God.

Henri Nouwen said, “The greatest call of a spiritual director is to open the door to the opportunities for spiritual

growth and sometimes to provide a glimpse of the great mysterious light behind the curtain of life and of the Lord who is the source of all knowing. … To receive spiritual direction is to recognize that God does not solve our problems or answer all our questions but leads us closer to the mystery of our existence where all questions cease.”

The three chairs of spiritual direction have much to offer those who seek growth in the Spirit!
 

(Teresa Venatta is the discernment companion for the Archdiocese of Indianapolis. She can be reached at spiritualdirection@archindy.org.) †