Faith and Family / Sean Gallagher

Learning is a lifelong project for both parents and children in families

Catholic schools across central and southern Indiana are now well into their new academic year.

My wife Cindy and I are now old enough as parents that we only have our two youngest sons still in school. But although Catholic schools may not play as large a role in our family’s life as it did when all five of our boys were students at the same time, our appreciation of the help they offer us as parents has only increased through the years.

At the same time, as our boys have gotten older, Cindy and I have also grown in our appreciation and awareness of just how much teaching and learning goes on in our home.

And it extends beyond our home on Indianapolis’ east side. Two of our sons now live on their own. But moments of teaching and learning continue to pop up with them regularly.

As our boys have gotten older, the lessons to be taught and learned have changed. The dos and don’ts of filing tax returns, for example, aren’t something you have to think about when parenting a 5-year-old. The constant flow of change in parenting keeps Cindy and me on our toes. It can be pretty tiring, too.

Paradoxically, while change is a constant in parenting, other things remain the same, no matter how young or old your children are.

In some respects, the aspects of parenting that are constant can be the most important. Forming and teaching children by example and word how to be virtuous and to grow in their relationship with Christ and the Church are lifelong projects.

Because it continues on into adulthood, the flow of learning in the home goes back and forth. It’s not just parents teaching children. Parents are always in need of learning how to grow in virtue and in a faithful living out of their divine calling and their faith in Christ.

I know well that this is the case for myself every day. And there have been many moments through the years when my sons have given me examples of virtuous and holy living that stop me in my tracks, both in gratitude to God for the blessing he’s given me in my sons, and also as an examination of conscience for myself.

When we as parents step back and consider the mission we’ve been given in forming the children given to us by God, we might be tempted to view it from 30,000 feet. After all, it is a task that is both at the very heart of what it means to be a parent and a duty that is never really completely fulfilled.

And while it is good for parents at times to gaze at the big picture of their vocation, we should always remember that it is carried out in the little moments of everyday life.

That reality can be scary, though, given how often all of us as humans—parents or not—fail in our daily lives to give the good example of virtue and faith we’re called and empowered by grace to give.

God, though, wants to sweep that fear away for us parents through his gift of mercy. Yes, we fall in lots of little ways in daily life to form our children in virtue and faith. But our heavenly Father is always there to forgive us.

And the more that all of us in families—parents and children alike—are aware of his mercy, the more that we’ll become channels of his mercy to each other.

Such mercy, such divine mercy, is surely the lifeblood and water flowing from Christ’s pierced side that help parents and children together grow in virtue and faith. †